5lbs 3 weeks

A weekend update. Que raro!

After a particularly whiny session with Christine I'm a little unsure of what to do. I've developed a sort of screw-it attitude about food. I've been maintaining my weight more or less (literally more or less... I'm not up 5lbs or anything).

Christine sort of hurt my feelings today when she said, "We can maintain here... which is really what you've been doing... but I think you'd look better with more weight off."

I find that totally exasperating. I've lost 70lbs. I'm probably the healthiest I've been in a decade and a half. I have a good job, I am getting a good apartment, I have a good boyfriend, I have good friends. There is nothing I feel my weight is holding me back from. I don't think I'm being closed to any opportunities. And yet, she's right. I would look better thinner. I'm not a thin girl. I'm an above-average sized girl. Not a big girl, not husky, not chunky, not fat, not obese.

I am trying to figure out how to get my head back in the game and actually start losing weight again. I'm debating giving it a timeline. I go to Italy June 2. I wonder if I can try and lose 5lbs by then. Don't worry about exercise, just really stick to a diet. Throw away all the chocolate chips in the apartment. No more baking cookies (even if they are low fat) no more pumpkin muffins. Back to strict head-in-the-game-diet. A friend gave me an organic chocolate bar for letting her stay with me and I think maybe that's my chocolate fix for the next two weeks. I can eat it all right now... but better to budget it out. A piece here and there will last the whole while. 5lbs in three weeks may be ambitious especially with memorial day in the middle but let's try. Eye on the prize. 5lbs down would put me at Christine's original goal for me (though she's seemed to have shifted it down a little bit but we haven't really talked number goals yet).

No late night eating. When it's evening and I get munchy I can have a bar. Or FiberOne brownie. Fin.

No more eating roommates food.

No more dessert.

No more bread and oil at restaurants before dinner.

Do not make this even though I have short bread cookies to get rid of: http://thestonesoup.com/blog/2012/04/is-milk-chocolate-better-than-dark-chocolate/

I will try to:

Log my calories every day

Walk to work

Drink a lot of water

Buy fruit and eat that instead of sweets.

Three weeks of diet.