Tuesday, March 26, 2013

10lbs up

Once again, I find myself struggling.

I went to Christine yesterday and she looked through her notes and in a year I gained 10lbs. Though, honestly, most of that weight was gained between December and now. Holiday weight I guess.

I just feel generally unfocused and prior to Christine I probably on average gained about 10lbs a year.

I eat when I'm bored.
I eat when I'm stressed.
I eat when I'm tired.
I eat to celebrate.

I feel like there's rarely a time when I have ideal conditions for losing weight. Not bored but not stressed. Happy but not tired. Happy but not TOO happy.

Right now, my apartment is being renovated so I'm kind of homeless. I'm in the midst of a job search. I guess things are unstable. But overall, I feel like I just don't want to diet.

Part of me thinks I should just try. And if I just try a little, things will work out eventually. I think I need to make a commitment to food journaling and sending it to Christine.

The issue there is when I mess up, I don't want to send it to her. But those are probably the days she most needs to see.

When I was 10lbs lighter I still wanted to lose weight and found it incredibly difficult at that point and maybe this is just discouragement. Why bother? I can't lose it anyway.

WW was a huge success and then a huge bust.

What to do, friends?