Thursday, June 9, 2011

Size 10!

I know Ms. Tinawi had a post like this, and as I sort of am trailing her in her weight loss journey, it's fun to hit the same milestones.

There were two things that directly contradict one another troubling me in my life:
1) I've lost 50+ pounds, I have no clothes that fit me.
2) I HATE shopping. With a passion.

Now why I hate shopping might be worth exploring. I don't like not fitting into clothes. I am indecisive about clothes. I don't have much money to spend. I get tired easily. I hate crowds. I hate fitting rooms. I hate lines.

And that's only the tip of it. I can remember so many disappointing shopping trips. Not fitting into size 16 pants. Fearing having to switch over to the "Wides" or plus size clothing. I remember crying fits with my mom when I was as young as middle school, over which size I was. Shopping has always been for me a traumatic and unsatisfying experience.

However, the situation of having no clothes was getting dire. I went through my closets with some friends and we ended up throwing away almost 20 pairs of pants (not to mention all the shirts/sweaters/suits/jackets). As I stared at all the empty hangers in my formerly filled closet, I knew it was time.

Now, my aunt is an A+ shopper. You have never seen anything like it. I certainly hadn't. For a while, the solution to my shopping detestation was to tell her what I needed and have her go up to her house in the Pocanos, sift through the outlet mall, bring back a bunch of clothes for me to try on, and return whatever didn't fit. Now this solved two problems 1) my unending hatred of shopping 2) her compulsion to shop, without financial or space consequences. However this time was different. She told me she wasn't sure on what size I was or what I was wearing now, so I needed to go up to the Pocanos with her to try things on.

Nice things about shopping in the Pocanos with my aunt:
1) I'm with my aunt. She is a no-judgey, no-nonsense kind of shopper. I don't usually feel bad about myself as a person shopping with her.
2) She knows the crossings like the back of her hand.
3) She can tear through racks like a Tazmanian Devil and come out with handfuls of clothing that look good but you'd never guess it.
4) She can assess within 30 seconds of walking into a store whether or not you will find anything worthwhile in it.
5) Pennsylvania has no sales tax on clothes.
6) It was memorial day weekend, so the sales were UNREAL.

Bad things about shopping in the Pocanos with my aunt.
1) There are over 100 stores in the crossings.
2) It was memorial day, the sales were awesome, there were probably a million people there.
3) My aunt has the most unreal stamina you can imagine.

So, good outweighed the bad. I remember at the start of our shopping trip BOTTOMS were the most important thing on my mind. We were in J-Crew and I was sifting through bunches of cute skirts looking for my right size. I pull out a pair of 14 and my aunt says, "Oh, I don't know about that..." And I was like, well I've been a 12/14 mostly so... and she was like. "Hm... well... try this too." And she pulls out a size 10 skirt. I gave her a funny look but she ignored it and we continued. The 14 literally drooped on me. I could probably squeeze it off without undoing the zipper. It was definitely too big. And the 10 fit perfectly. I was shocked. L sized shirts were looking baggy, and my aunt had every single sales lady in J-Crew running around looking for smaller sizes for me.

It was a totally unreal experience.

I think it digs back to the issue of not knowing what I look like. I'm in a weird place between Average and Fat Girl. I still am carrying a lot of weight on my body, and I know that. But I've been feeling more and more normal. I can wear shorter skirts, dresses, higher heels. I'm fitting into sizes I can't remember the last time I fit into.

I know this post requires some pictures. Maybe soon!

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